The smell of settling

The reason why I haven't written any posts in a while is because I've been super busy with my orientation week at the University of Bergen.

Since my last post, a lot has changed... (and so this post is going to be quite long).

I met a girl, Lisanne, from the Netherlands on the first day of the introductory program. We were sitting next to each other at the lecture, and since everyone was an international student, there was a greater willingness to meet new people. What was funny in a coincidental way was the fact that once I started to talking to Lisanne we found out we would be studying the exact same course this semester. How weird is that? Of all the people in the room (which was a lot, there are around 800 international students who have come on exchange to University of Bergen this semester) the person sitting next to me is doing the same course. It was a pretty cool coincidence, or could it have been fate? But anyways, moving on...

A series of events in the shape of new found friendships occurred after meeting Lisanne. I met Mila, another girl from the Netherlands, through Lisanne as they go to the same university. Through meeting Mila, I then met her housemates, Emma and Sarah, who are from Belgium, and also their close friend, Margot, who doesn't live with them but is always around them nonetheless (as they study the same course). I loved meeting these girls because my second week in Bergen was so much more enjoyable as I had people to go out with and do activities, like hiking for instance, which is what we did on the weekend, but not only that, we all get on so well, and easily too, even though we may not have the exact same interests and we're not even studying the same thing, there is always something to talk about when I see them. Continuing on, then this week I met another girl briefly who was in the same faculty as me and then when we went to get a coffee I met Lucia, from Slovakia, and Anna, from Germany. We were all going to the student organisation stands, so we just decided to go together, and through this I got to know Anna and Lucia more, even though again they are not studying the same courses as me. Instead of going with my original mentor group I was assigned to, I went with Lucia and Anna to their mentor group (which I feel I should of been in anyways because it's all the students studying literature courses). Whilst following around my new mentor group, I then got to meet Sanne and Guro who are both from Norway (sadly they are studying literature in Norwegian so won't be in any of the same classes as me), and I got on so well with them because we had many of the same interests in regards to music, social life, wanting to volunteer, travelling.

Now while that was a long passage, and you may be wondering why did I even bother going into that much detail of who I met, but the reason I did was because of the fact that I wouldn't of met these people without having met someone else prior to that. When it comes to connections in the social network, it's definitely about WHO you know than what you know that helps you make new connections and expand your friendships.

I realised after thinking back on the events that followed this particular day that the more willing you are about expanding your social network, the more people you will meet just from a brief encounter with one person. Being abroad in a new place with loads of new people to potentially meet, it's as if your life were a game of Jenga. Now stay with me on this metaphor I have: when you play Jenga, everything is in it's right orderly place, but then you take one piece out from it's "comfort zone" and place it in a completely new, foreign place. However then more pieces get removed from their comfort zone and added with that one original piece, now creating a new "comfort zone" whereby the pieces have adapted to staying in their new, foreign place.

Since I first moved here to Bergen, I have been a piece of Jenga that has been moved from many of it's "comfort zones" to create new bonds with different 'pieces' and form many different comfort zones, except unlike Jenga where at a certain point the structure falls apart, these new 'pieces' or actually people that I've met and created a new comfort zone with, have stronger bonds than just falling apart. I think especially when you're travelling and you meet a new person and start talking to them and begin to have longer conversations, that blossoming friendship that's developing is hard to ignore and just walk away from forgetfully.

Since meeting all these new and amazing people, I have started becoming more and more settled each day that I'm here.

Yet, as much as these people have the bigger impact on my settling, there are other factors as well that have helped me feel comfortable again and not out of depth.

1) My room: I visited Ikea today to get a few more (final) things for my kitchen and room (and because it's the cheapest place for everything you need in a home/study/work environment, especially in Norway). While I was there I happened to pick up a fake plant (I don't really want to promote fake flowers, but in this case it is nice to have as something pretty to look at) and a couple of lovely, fresh smelling candles (which make up for having fake flowers, because now I can pretend my room smells pretty as if it were from the flowers) - and this has made my room feel less like "I am only staying here for 5 months" and gives it just a tad bit of character:

And thanks to my amazing parents who sent me some little knick knacks from back home, I've been able to blue-tack some pictures and notes to the wall of my study desk - so now I don't have to look at a bland wall when I work:

Also, I finally did a big food shop and now my fridge and cupboard actually look like a person is living here, not just someone who has a few bits of fruit and loads of microwave meals instead. This is meant finally I could have a cup of coffee (since I was kindly lent a pot from one of my friends here) - it was so good. Plus the best part was that my mug for my coffee I have is the same one as back home (thanks Ikea), so while I was sipping my yummy chocolate coffee and eating some chocolate chip cookies, I was immediately reminded of home, and I thought "this is what it smells like when I'm home studying" with the smells of my coffee and candles filling my studio room.

Since I had bad internet connection when I first arrived here I couldn't post any photos of what my room looks like, so here is some now:

2) Thinking back to the reasons I wanted to come on exchange: This has helped me settle quite significantly too. After speaking on Skype to my mentor from back in Perth, she gave me many ideas on how to break through the horrible feeling of being taken out of your comfort zone and ways to overcome it. One in particular was a really fantastic idea which didn't even cross my mind until Kat (my mentor) suggested it. She told me that whenever I start getting down and have the attitude "why am I even here??" that I should think back to the very beginning of why I wanted to even go on exchange in the first place then write these reasons down so whenever I'm feeling glum I can look at them and be reminded and inspired again. So I've written them on a big sheet of paper right in front of my face when I'm at my study desk:

 These were my reasons:

- To meet new people from all over the world
- To travel more
- To volunteer in new roles and new organisations that are not available back in Perth
- To build up my network internationally
- To experience living out of home and in a new country
- For the life changing experience: learning more about myself, growing/developing myself more, being pushed out of my comfort zone

The last two points have been good for me to remember since I was feeling homesick at first and did ponder why I wanted to come such a long way from home and especially in a place where I didn't know anyone nor the language (or really much about the culture apart from what I've read in books). It's made me remember to embrace being pushed out from my comfort zone and also having the opportunity to live on my own and trying to manage my money for rent, food shopping, electricity, while still also needing money for social activities. While I have lived out of home before when I was 18, I was still living with relatives, so even if I was paying board, it wasn't exactly a massive wake-up call to "this is reality". Even though after living away from home when I last travelled made me appreciate my parents, this adventure is making me appreciate them so much more because I am completely independent here in my house: managing my money, cooking, cleaning, etc, etc.

So now I'm settled in my house, the next stages of my settlement here are my University courses and volunteering.

Hopefully will have more information on those two topics next week :)